
Bondage-inspired looks have snuck into the mainstream enough that one might see them on the runway or in magazines or your Etsy searches. But are they wearable in real life? I often see BDSM elements worn over white button-up tops, but how realistic are BDSM pieces in everyday ensembles?
Very much so, but probably only if you’re willing to step slightly out of your comfort zone.
As a goth at heart, I try to add a little edge to most of my outfits. It took me a lot to start wearing that gothic heart on my sleeve without feeling ridiculous but I’ve done it enough times to share photos on this fashion post. Once I started, I found myself more comfortable with it.
So here are some of my favourite everyday BDSM looks for you to try.
Utilize a Corset Belt
I bought this corset belt from Retro Luxe on clearance from ASOS for a Sansa Stark Halloween costume and lemme just tell you, this belt has changed me as a person. Might sound frivolous but it’s a wonderful piece that ads a LOT to the outfits that I wear it with.
It’s funny because most of the time corset belts are shown over a white tunic, which looks great, but doesn’t exactly show a versatility of the piece. I’ve used my corset belt for a myriad of ensembles.
Like this look, which is a cool bondage Christmas look I wore to a church Christmas event that took place on a Friday the 13th, so I HAD to do something goth but also sort of church-appropriate:
Or this look, which is an early-fall look I put together for work, which made these 80s era vintage separates look goth AF:
Or this summer look, which was definitely sweaty but also somehow seasonally appropriate:
A Leather Skirt Goes A Long Way
I don’t know why leather always grabs so much attention. But it does. And it does in a big way. I’ve been fortunate to find a handful of great leather skirts on my thrift store excursions and I like to wear them whenever I can.
Yes, they are sweaty and kind of awkward to wear in public, but if you want to give your outfit some edge without too much effort, a leather skirt will take you far, baby.
I wore this outfit to church. The sweater is a classic 80s look, but it looks even more amazing with this leather skirt that I can imagine Mrs. Wardwell from Chilling Adventures of Sabrina wearing in Hell:
And I’d say this look is pretty cutesy, but the leather skirt def gives it an edge. I really love pairing this leather mini with my polka-dot tights.
Give ‘Em a Peek of A Harness
So you can get those stretchy lingerie-style harness pretty cheap anywhere. Or a funky cage bra. While these pieces make for great bedroom attire, they also can work as great layering pieces beneath low-cut shirts, adding extra dimension and edge to what would otherwise be a “normal” outfit.
In this look I also added a little vintage clip-on broach to make kind of a blended 90s’s/Victorian/bondage look that I thought was pretty funky.
Harness Belt Over Clothes
So here’s your standard BDSM element used as “everyday” attire. The harness over a buttonfront top.
You can buy cheap pleather harnesses all over the place now. I picked this one up from Poshmark and it was some made in China knockoff made for a svelte woman. So it didn’t QUITE fit. I’d also advise against buying cheap stuff because it never lasts and never funtions well. This one slid alllllllllll the fuck over the place.
So I modified it a bit with one of my silver necklaces and wore it over one of my favourite shift dresses. This was my first attempt to do the whole harness thing and I think it looks okay. I’m on a lookout for a better harness that fits but it at least inspired me to try more BDSM harness everyday looks.
My next harness will likely be from DEANDRI, which is a vegan US-based gothic designer brand that I’m dying to get some stuff from.
Do You Dare to Wear BDSM Everyday?
Now, I realize that BDSM isn’t exactly the most accesable or “normal” trend, but its edgy asthestic is become more trendy than ever. I think some of that comes from our current state of affairs, where that whole Matrix / Mad Max sort of “doomsday” vibe is now working its way into our everyday ensembles.
Fashion speaks of the times and I’m down with expressing a little bit of angst with all my floral print.
But what about you? Whether or not BDSM is your thing, does the style intrigue you? What everyday BDSM looks would (or do you currently) rock?